Water

On Fishbowls

"Why did the fishbowl cross the road?"

"Why?"

"To get to the bar on the other side."

A fishbowl walked into a bar and the bartender said, "Hey, didn't I see you in the joke above?"

"Yes, that was me," said the fishbowl.

"I thought you looked familiar. What will it be?" said the bartender.

And the fishbowl said, "Oh, the usual.  Some fish with some water, of course."

"How many fishbowls does it take to change a light bulb?"

"How many?"

"No one knows."

MISCELLANEOUS THOUGHTS AND SOME PROFANITY

Hey Food & Water!  I say when you go into my body.  Why can't I say when you come out of my body?

Do bears bear anything in mind?

"Is there going to be a race war?"
"Yup, lots of them in Rio de Janiero at the Olympic Games."

A man was shouting on the street, "Fuckin' oath!  God damn oath!  Fuckin' oath!"  His friend asked, "What are you doing?"  The man replied, "Swearing an oath."

No one is above using profanity--not even God.  Every time he looks down upon Earth and sees what the human beings are doing he says, "What the fuck?"

I WANT TO COMPLAIN ABOUT EVERYTHING . . .

I want to complain about everything, but I don't know where to begin.

Why does this picture have nothing to do with this blog?

 
Why are books made into movies?  Why can't they just let them be books?

Why are Blackberry keypads so small?

Why is Dracula so bloody ugly?   

Why don't zombies use deodorant?
 
Why doesn't hair fall out of my armpits and crotch instead of my head?

Why do I cry when I spill milk?

Why does this blog have to end when I was just getting started?

WRITE WHAT YOU KNOW

I know that 2 + 2 = 4.  (Does that make 4 bitwoual?)

I know that God is not dead.  (He started that rumor to hide his income and avoid taxes.)

I know that water is wet -- moist of the time.

I know that grass is green, and has nothing to do with snot.

I know that if you jump off a cliff, then sooner or later you will touch the ground.

I no when it comes to drugs.

I know that money talks, and never stops.  (I had to move my piggy bank out of my bedroom to get some sleep.)

I know that Snow White never had a problem having multiple orgasms.

I know when to stop.

WHY?

Why is the Monday after Easter Sunday a holiday?   Did Jesus need a day to recover after rising from the dead?

Why is water wet?   Would we save time if water was dry?

Why does bus rhyme with Gus?  Why doesn't bus rhyme with orange?

Why is hot not hot when it's cold?  Why is cold not cold when it's hot? 

Why don't bad smells bother dogs?

Why don't dreams get released on DVD's?

Why aren't more lies true?

Why is why why?  Why isn't why x or z?

Why is it so hard to blog with limited Internet access?



PICTURES NOT AT AN EXHIBITION . . .

MAGIC WITH NUMBERS, STONEHENGE AND THE PYRAMIDS

Light a candle and place it on a table.

The distance between Stonehenge and The Great Pyramids is 2,183 miles.
Take 2,183 and divide it by pi (3.1415) and you get 694.89098.
Take 694.89098 and divide it by pi and you get 221.19719.
Take 221.19719 and divide it by pi and you get 70.41133.
Take 70.41133 and divide it by pi and you get 22.41328

Fill a container with 22.41328 ounces of water.
Place the container on the table near the candle.
Pause and take several deep breaths relaxing your mind and body.
Make sure you are totally relaxed before doing the next step.

Take the container, containing 22.41328 ounces of water, and pour it over the candle.
Not only will the candle go out, but the table will get wet as well!    Amazing!