WRITE WHAT YOU KNOW

I know that 2 + 2 = 4.  (Does that make 4 bitwoual?)

I know that God is not dead.  (He started that rumor to hide his income and avoid taxes.)

I know that water is wet -- moist of the time.

I know that grass is green, and has nothing to do with snot.

I know that if you jump off a cliff, then sooner or later you will touch the ground.

I no when it comes to drugs.

I know that money talks, and never stops.  (I had to move my piggy bank out of my bedroom to get some sleep.)

I know that Snow White never had a problem having multiple orgasms.

I know when to stop.

BOOKS YOU MAY NEVER READ . . .

The Sound And The Fury - The story of a man who is angry over his bad case of flatulence.

Tender Is The Night - A mad scientist terrorizes the world by pounding the darkness with a metal meat tenderizer.

Seven women's stories are told during their menstrual cycle in Les Misérables.

After catching 21 fish, a fisherman catches a magic lamp in Catch 22.

Oliver Twist - An orphaned piece of licorice struggles to survive. 

A family's fortune mysteriously disappears after the spring breaks on their favorite wind-up toy in Gone With The Wind. 

A mousetrap maker gets stuck in a loaf of bread in Catcher In The Rye.

Protagonist Theodore Thanatos explores the world of necrophilia in The Naked And The Dead.

A watchmaker successfully makes watches from citrus fruits in A Clockwork Orange. 

Of Human Bondage - A story about income and other taxes.