I REMEMBER . . .

Some doctor told me that I have amnesia.  I don't remember his name.  I feel okay.  I think he was mistaken.  My memory is fine.  I can remember things that never happened. 

I remember:

- When an incurable plague raged around the world and killed off nobody;

- When a clown saved Earth from an alien-balloon invasion, and created another universe with a Big Bang;

- When Moses said to God, "Ten?  You only have ten?" 

- When an alien, with a degree in anal probeology, suffered major depression because he could not decide who the biggest asshole was on Earth;

- When I had only a month to live, but lived longer because I did not have a calendar;

- When a zombie ate my brains and then complained, "I'm still hungry!  There wasn't enough."

- When I had to choose between love or money and chose bananas; and

Finally I remember when I ran out of ideas.

HODGEPODGE . . .

 

Moses would have been overqualified if he had worked as a plumber fixing leaks.

Moses would save time if he switched to an underarm deodorant that went on dry.

IT IS 4:00 A.M. AND I MUST WRITE SOMETHING !

I will not allow my imaginary friends to set unrealistic expectations.

I have never had an epiphany, but I have faked a few.

I am skilled at being unskilled.  Should I run for office?

On books?   I enjoy any book containing words.  Currently  I am reading  A History of History  by Itis Bygone.  I'm still afraid to read books about phobias.

Jack and Jill went up the hill

To fetch a pail of water.

Jack came down with The Ten Commandments

Moses was pissed

And Jill became a hermit.

(Eventually she got her own Reality TV show.) 

Some beavers are apathetic, and some give a damn.

I do not belong here.  My soul was on its way to another planet when Cosmic Post screwed up, and delivered it to Earth.   The planet my soul was supposed to go to is a planet where sensitive and honest people are not ridiculed for being sensitive and honest.  It is a planet where corporations rely on the Arts for financial support.  I cannot tell you more because of  a confidentiality agreement which was part of the settlement with Cosmic Post. 

It is 4:00 a.m. and I must write something!