SHORT STORY IDEAS . . .

During a hurricane, the son of a bitch battles the storm to stop fleas from blowing away.

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The night before the U.S. presidential election, John F. Kennedy appears on television shouting, "April Fools!  April Fools!"

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A feminist, hired by the post office, leads a campaign to stamp out all-male mail boxes.

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An hallucination teams up with a dream to fight against a gang of imagination killers.

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Years of financial hardship and never-ending work, makes a single parent break into a prison to get a break.

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After surviving a forest fire, a tree turns to a life of crime by robbing branches of banks and giving leaves to the poor.

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As a plague rages across the globe, a funny bone technician says, "I'm outta this blog before I get sick!"

ON CRIME

A criminal walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "What will it be?"

"I've just escaped," says the criminal.  "Have you got anything that will reduce my sentence when they catch me?"

"I sure do," says the bartender.

The bartender serves him a martini garnished with arsenic.

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Q:  Why did the criminal cross the road?

A:  To steal a chicken.

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"Knock. Knock."

"Who's there?"

"A robber."

"A robber who?"

"Never mind and gimme your money!"

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Oh the poor robber!  He froze to death trying to rob a snowbank.

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BREAKING NEWS:  Toronto Police arrested and charged a writer with theft.  Police said that Sam Scribbler was at the public library stealing ideas.  Scribbler will appear in court on June 31.

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PETER PAN'S SHADOW JAILED FOR DESERTION!

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The judge says to the criminal, "Have you got anything to say before I sentence you?"

"Yes," says the criminal.

"What would you like to say?"

"I love action.  If you're gonna sentence me, then could you make me a predicate?"

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