SOME COURSES AT VOID CITY COLLEGE

I have always wanted to study philosophy.  Void City College, in Nowhere, offers the following courses:

The Philosophy of Gardening

Students learn about the meaning of flowers in this dirt-cheap course.

The Wisdom Teeth Lectures

Dr. Dennis Dental discusses the ethics of whiter teeth, and the values of pain from root canal.  Dr. Dental also answers the question, "How wise are wisdom teeth?"

Immanuel Kant's Mathematics and Mortgages

Students learn how Kant's Philosophy of Mathematics relates to mortgages.

(It doesn't, but don't tell anyone.)

Philosophical Concepts of Income Tax
Dr. Allen Fittle Von Fickelfop uses the Socratic Method combined with Marx's Theory of Alienation to teach students how to morally cheat on their taxes.  (Students must sign a waiver absolving the College of all responsibility should they be arrested.)

I will pass on taking these courses.  I have no interest in gardening, teeth, mathematics, or cheating the government out of money.

FASCINATING FACTS

Frankenstein, Dracula, and the Wolfman have never filed income tax returns.

Emo Rubik, the inventor of Rubik's Cube, loves to square dance.

Illness is the number one cause of sickness.

Jellyfish do not like Jello.   (Perhaps that is because they don't have brains.)

Dinosaurs do not make good astronauts.

Online computer problems often mean short blogs.  

TAXES ARE THE ROOT OF ALL HUMOR?

We human beings are an odd bunch.  We love to be patriotic!  We're proud of our countries!  We love to wave our country's flag!  How fantastic when our countries win wars, and sporting events!
And then income tax time comes  . . . 
At tax time, we don't want to have anything to do with our country, or give our country its due.  Not only do we not want to give our country its due, but we want to take from our country.  At tax time, we don't want our country to win.



We talk about "doing our taxes."  Isn't it our taxes that do us?


Death and Taxes walk into a bar.  The bartender takes one look at them and says, "I'm outta here!"
Death and Taxes are about to get up and leave when a waiter comes over and says, "No, don't leave.  We've got to finish this joke.  What will it be?"
Death says, "I'll have a Zombie, please."
The waiter turns to Taxes and asks, "And you?"
Taxes says, "I'll have Everything."
"Everything?" asks the waiter.
"Yes, Everything," says Taxes.  "You might as well give it to me now because I am going to get it eventually."  

RANDOM MUSINGS . . .

Q:  Who killed John Fitzgerald Kennedy?
A:   Lee Harvey Everybody.

Is there any money in running a Night Care for children of vampires?

What is the purpose of a sunken living room other than to injure you when you are tired or drunk?

Does a fly look for the biggest, stinking  pile of caca because he wants the best for his family?

How far can you get with an I.Q. of two-by-four?

Is my life worthless?  "No!"  say the income tax people.

Are there any vegetarian cannibals?

How can I cut my energy costs all year round?    Living on the street?

Is marriage sometimes occasional sex with someone you don't like?

Is this enough for now?