Ten Warning Signs for Alzheimer's

1 - Memory Loss
        It is normal to occasionally forget things.  A person with Alzheimer's will make enormous profits to the car industry which was abolished in 1847.

2 - Difficulty Performing Tasks
      Some tasks are difficult to perform.  A person with Alzheimer's may have trouble performing easy tasks such as moving a mountain from the refrigerator to the stove.

3 - Problems Speaking
           Everyone has trouble finding the right word sometimes.  A person with Alzheimer's may fogget simea gorba to swoosh.

4 - Disorientation In Time and Space
        It is normal to forget what day it is.  A person with Alzheimer's can become lost if abducted and then dropped off somewhere in space by prankster aliens.

5 - Impaired Judgment
       It is normal to make questionable decisions.  People with Alzheimer's may decide to wear heavy clothing on a hot day, or write a blog about warning signs for Alzheimer's.

6 - Misplacing Things
       Everyone occasionally misplaces a wallet or keys.  People with Alzheimer's may put things in inappropriate places such as their feet in their mouths.

7 - Mathematics
        Not everyone likes mathematics.  People with Alzheimer's can't count.

TIDBITS

"Aren't you lonely being on your own?"

"But I am not on my own.  When the voices in my head are not talking at me, then the voices in my head are talking to me." 
"You hear voices?"
"Yeah, don't you?"
"No."
"No?  Then how do you know what I'm saying?"

***

"Are you the person who has a friend with Alzheimer's disease?"

"I don't know.  I don't remember."

***

"How ya making out with the voices in your head?"

"Great!  They're happy that I installed hardwood floors, and a room with a view in my head." 

***

 "Does it bother you being in debt?"

"A little, but I know that I am not alone.  Large numbers of people in debt owe money."

***

 "Does stress reduce its stress by losing weight?"

***

"Had enough?"

I FEAR . . .

I fear that I am a character in a dream, and the dreamer is about to awaken.  And then I become a fast-fading memory soon forgotten.  

I fear a thesaurus will attack me and eat my words.

I fear sunshine at night.  Why?  What is the sun doing up so late?  Up to no-good no doubt.

I fear talking spiders on the World Wide Web.

I fear I'll get lead poisoning from pencils.

I fear that diseases cause sickness.

I fear if I tell the truth, people will think I am lying.

I fear one day the government will make free taxable.

I fear being around farting beans.

I fear that someone will throw a dinner in my honor, and I will be covered with food.

I fear my life is taking place in the mind of an Alzheimer's patient.

I fear running out of ideas and having to end my blog abrupt--

AM I GETTING OLD?

Am I getting old? I go out and then get lost finding my way home. I turn on the radio and can't hear what I am seeing. I get out-of-breath petting my neighbour's poodle. My bowel's move without leaving a forwarding address. Is there no hope?