TIDBITS

"Aren't you lonely being on your own?"

"But I am not on my own.  When the voices in my head are not talking at me, then the voices in my head are talking to me." 
"You hear voices?"
"Yeah, don't you?"
"No."
"No?  Then how do you know what I'm saying?"

***

"Are you the person who has a friend with Alzheimer's disease?"

"I don't know.  I don't remember."

***

"How ya making out with the voices in your head?"

"Great!  They're happy that I installed hardwood floors, and a room with a view in my head." 

***

 "Does it bother you being in debt?"

"A little, but I know that I am not alone.  Large numbers of people in debt owe money."

***

 "Does stress reduce its stress by losing weight?"

***

"Had enough?"

VACANT MIND FOR SALE

Death is a once in a lifetime opportunity. (I can't wait.)


Need more incentive?  Try taking cocaine.


I have used my line of credit to tie myself up in debt. 


Want a successful business?  Try selling drugs.


Knowledge is power. (But it cannot replace electricity.)


Is masturbation self-serve sex?


I want to make money, but making money is illegal.


Is thinking easier than you think?

 

GOVERNMENT DEBT

Why is it that a government can accumulate massive debt, and then use this debt as collateral to borrow more money?

Government: "Can we borrow a billion dollars?"

Money Lender: "What do you have as collateral?"

Government: "We owe three trillion dollars."

Money Lender: "Sure. No problem."