ENOUGH ABOUT ME . . . LET'S TALK ABOUT ME

I am Gary Johnston of Toronto -- not to be confused with Gary Johnston of Toronto.  Except for the hair, eyes, nose, mouth and skin color, I look like Brad Pitt.  

From the time I was little, as far back as I can remember, I always thought, "When I grow up, I want to be bigger."

My hobbies are thinking, thinking about thinking, and thinking about thinking about thinking.  I also enjoy finding the sadness in everyday life.  It is a wasted day if I have not cried at least once.

I was married for several years.  I married because I was in love.  The marriage did not work out.  If I marry again, then it will be for money.  

My political beliefs lie between Peter Pan and Wyatt Earp.

As for my religious beliefs, I wonder whether God believes in me.  If She does, then She has a funny way of showing it.

There is only one thing I hope to do before I die: return my library books.   I do not want overdue fines hanging over my head for Eternity?

MY LIFE AS A KAYAK or RANDOM THOUGHTS ON A PIECE OF PAPER

Would you buy meat from a butcher named Jack Ripper?

I had a dream that I was a mountain on a golf course.  Everyone hated me.

A true Canadian dog barks in English and French.

I put my money where my mouth is and discovered that money is not as good as food.

A cutting board will not protect you from ultra violet light.

Has anyone ever been attacked by a shark while surfing the Internet?

People eat rye bread.  Philosophers eat why bread.