AFFIRMATIONS

I am in control of my bladder and bowels.


I can act like an idiot in any situation.


I feel a great sense of happiness, security and well-being while I'm in denial.


I am grateful for all the grapefruit in my life.


I accept, appreciate and love myself while I masturbate.


I am positively negative in a positive way. 


I am a channel for pee-pee and caca.


I am peaceful and calm when unconscious.


I choose money--lots and lots of money. 


All is well. (I just fell in.)


I let go of love and embrace fear.


I am that I am, and that's it. 

I DON'T UNDERSTAND . . .

EVER HAD ONE OF THOSE DAYS?

Poor Sybil!  She labored all night building the best web a spider could build.  She used her skills to ensure that it was a perfect spider's web - the best spider's web ever!
Her "perfect" spider's web went down the drain, in the morning, when the Smiths used their bathroom sink.   Location!  Location!  Location!

A bad guy was on his way to a witness' house to ensure that the witness would not testify against the bad guy or his friends.  In the car, with the bad guy, was a bomb to blow up the witness.  No witness.  No evidence.

The bad guy had one of those days when the bomb accidentally went off in his car while he was driving.  Bye Bye bad guy!

How come we never hear a week, a month or a year say, "I'm having one of those days."?  Does that mean that weeks, months or years never have one of those days, or do have them and never complain?

Does God ever have one of those days?  Does God ever get up to find that the Universe is not unfolding as it should, and everything is going wrong?  What does God do when that happens?  Call a life coach?  Call a therapist?  Take antidepressants?  Meditate?  Do affirmations?  What does God do when having one of those days?

One of the ways of dealing with one of those days, is denial . . .