Not All About The Easter Bunny

"Why did the Easter Bunny cross the road?"
"To go to the bathroom?"
"No, to get eggs from the chocolate chickens on the other side."

"Knock.  Knock."

"Who's there?"

"Easter."

"Easter who?"

"Easter the Sun and West of the Moon."

"I don't get it."

"East of the Sun and West of the Moon is the title of a Norwegian book of fairy tales."

"That's not funny."

"Okay, so I am still waiting for my humor to rise from the dead."

"I can understand why it was crucified."

"How many Easter Bunnies does it take to change a light bulb?"

"How many?"

"Just one, but the light bulb has to burn out on Easter Sunday because the Easter Bunny is off the rest of the year.  Union rules."


"Why did the Easter Bunny wave a Canadian flag?"
"I dunno."
"He was tired of delivering chocolate eggs."
"Really?  I can understand why your humor was crucified."


The Easter Bunny slouched into a bar looking sad and the bartender said, "What will it be?"
And the Easter Bunny said, "Anything without chocolate, please."
The bartender brought the Easter Bunny a beer and said, "You're the Easter Bunny, right?"
"Yes," replied the Easter Bunny.
"Well," said the bartender, "it's Easter.  This is your day.  Why are you sad?"
And the Easter Bunny said, "I'll be going to Hell when I die."
"Why?" asked the bartender.
And the Easter Bunny said, "I was so shocked at seeing the stone rolled away that I forgot to leave chocolate eggs inside the tomb." 

THE DAY BEFORE EASTER

Twas the day before Easter and all through the tomb
Not a creature was stirring in that cold dark room.
The stockings were hung by the chimney with care.
The above line is not supposed to be there.

Jesus was nestled all snug in his bed
While visions of wooden crosses danced in his head.
Mary in her 'kerchief, and Joseph in his cap
Were wishing and hoping their son would come back.

  

 

Once again, this was Good for me.  Was it Good for you?

THINGS THAT DESTROY YOUR CONFIDENCE

Cannibals classify you as "junk food."

Skunks say how much you smell.

Aliens refuse to abduct you.

Beggars give you money. 

Muggers refuse to rob you.

Your doctor wants to put you in a cage.

Your imaginary friends won't invite you to their parties.

You're not on Santa's list.

The Easter Bunny throws eggs at you.

God won't add you as a friend on Facebook.