THEY SAID THAT?

 

 

THE CEILING RESPONDS

On Friday May 23, I prayed to the ceiling to win some miracle money. http://funnybonetechnician.blogspot.ca/2014/05/jesus-zeus-and-ceiling.html 

Today the ceiling looked down upon me and spoke.

             "High," said the ceiling.
             "I didn't win," I said.
             "Sorry, but I'm great at meeting with walls and watching over floors.  Answering prayers is something I need to work on.  Perhaps I will come up with ways to improve answering prayers if I think outside the room." 
             "Good Luck,"  I said

I think I will do what my friend Archibald McSilly did.  Instead of buying lottery tickets, he took the money he would have spent on tickets and put it in the bank.  After a year he had over four hundred dollars saved.  He then withdrew this money from the bank, and wasted it on something else.

JESUS, ZEUS AND THE CEILING

Several weeks ago a fifty-million-dollar lottery winner said that she had prayed to Jesus to send her some "miracle money" before she bought her ticket.  With the jackpot being 50 million dollars, she was not the only one praying to Jesus.

How did Jesus decide to answer her prayer out of all the people praying for the 50 million dollars?  Did he check the church-attendance records?  Did he look at The Good Deeds Book?  Did he draw her name from a hat?  Why did he let her win?

What about Jesus' priorities?  Did he ignore the prayers asking for relief from sickness, suffering, hunger and death just to make someone win 50 million dollars?  Is he still working on the other prayers because they are harder to answer?  Yes, he works in mysterious ways.

I thought I would give Jesus a try.  Before I bought a lottery ticket I prayed, "Dear Jesus, Please send me some miracle money.  Thank you."  Nothing.  I tried two more times praying louder and louder.  After all,  Jesus is over two thousand years old and his hearing must be going.  Nothing.  Jesus struck out.

I thought I would give Zeus a try.  He must be feeling neglected ever since Jesus took the spotlight.  Helping me win the lottery would be a wonderful comeback for Zeus.  Zeus struck out, too.  Perhaps he was not interested in making a comeback.  Perhaps he never heard my prayers because he was away on a course upgrading his thunderbolt skills.  Who knows?

To whom can I pray to?  Who will will send me miracle money?  The ceiling?  Very well then, I will pray to the ceiling.  Why not?  I looked up at it when praying to Jesus and Zeus.  May it will come through for me.

"Please, Ceiling, Please send me some miracle money.  Thank you."

Now I wait . . .      

TALKING ARCHITECTURE

Famous words of a building, "I just left Elvis."


Ceilings always say, "Hi."

"Where did humans did the idea that we have ears?" asked the wall.

Famous words of an empty room, "                                       ."

(It's empty.  Who is there to report what it said?)  

 

 

 

"How come I'm always on the bottom?" asked the floor.