AN APOCALYPSE, ANYONE?

An apocalypse walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "What will it be?"
The apocalypse says, "Give me a zombie, please."

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An apocalypse walks into a bar and stares sadly off into space.  The bartender asks, "Why are you sad?"
The apocalypse says, "My religion doesn't understand me."

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Q:  Why did the apocalypse cross the road?
A:  It was following a chicken.

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Q:  Why did the chicken cross the road?
A:  To get to another religion.

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Q:  How many apocalypses does it take to change a light bulb?

A:  One.  One apocalypse will change everything.

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"Knock. Knock."

"Who's there?"
"Apocalypse."
Apocalypse who?"
"Apocalypse Now."

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Q:  What do you get when you cross an apocalypse with peanut butter?

A:  A big sticky mess!

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Q:  What do you get when you cross an apocalypse with rotten eggs?
A:  A big stinky mess!

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Q:  What do you get when you cross an apocalypse with peanut butter and rotten eggs?

A:  The inside of a baby's diaper.

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Q:  What's the difference between an apocalypse and food?
A:  You don't know?  You must have some interesting meals.

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Q:  What did the apocalypse say to doomsday?

A:   Apocalypse said, "Is this it?"

***

An apocalypse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "The End Is Here!"