WHAT IS THE SOUND OF ONE GRASSHOPPER THINKING?

What does a grasshopper think about between jumps?  Politics?  Religion?  How to be the best pests?  

Here are some grasshopper thoughts:


"Did Lee Harvey Oswald have a sex change?  Was he once a woman who was dumped by JFK, and had a sex-change operation before getting revenge?"



"I'm getting tired of eating plants.  Should I try that brown stuff the flies eat?"



"I could jump higher if they repealed the Law of Gravity."



"How come I only see my twin when I look in the water?"



"How much money would I make if I started selling grass?"



"How come we grasshoppers never make it to the Olympics?"



"Should I walk instead of jump?"



"Public transit sucks on this lawn!"



"How many grasshoppers die, each year, from overdosing on weed?"



"Eeeewww!  This brown stuff tastes like shit!"



"What do sound like when I think?"