It's All About 2017

2017 walked into a bar and the bartender said, "Get out!  You're too early.  Come back at midnight."



"Why did 2017 cross the road?"
"Why?"
"To meet January First for a date."



"How many 2017s does it take to change a light bulb?"
"How many?"
"One.  There is only one 2017, but it does not change light bulbs.  2017 will change you.  By the time 2017 is done, you will be older and wiser -- well perhaps just older."



2017 is on the couch in a psychiatrist's office.  It says to the psychiatrist, "Doc, I want to write my memoirs but I have no memories."
And the psychiatrist says, "Give it time."



Poor Eternity!  It's impossible for it to celebrate New Years.



2016 says to 2017, "Good Luck!  I hope you do better than I did."

"Knock.  Knock."

"Who's there?"

"Happy."

"Happy who?"

"Happy 2017!"