Dear God,
Isn't it time you renovated Heaven? It's been the same since Eternity. How about updating its look?
Get rid of the clouds. They're bland. I know that the white clouds match the white gowns everyone wears. Why not change the decor and allow people to wear what they want? Why does everyone have to wear the same thing? Is there a commandment stating that all dead people have to dress alike?
As for the furniture? Keep the same simple atmosphere by getting some easy-to-assemble stuff from Ikea. I'm sure Ikea will give you a discount with you being God. Just make sure you bring three pieces of identification to prove who you are. You can give Heaven a simple and modern look without spending too much money.
And while you're at it, Hell could use some air-conditioning. The people there are starting to complain. Thanks.
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