Reasons For Gaps Between Blogs

Here are some reasons I don't post a blog every day:

- My time machine broke and I won't get back until yesterday.

- The dog ate my computer.

- I'm helping God run the Universe.

- I died, and it takes me much longer to do things.

- Donald Trump and the Russians conspire to block my blogs.

- I washed my keyboard and can't do a thing with it.

- My computer has the bird flu and keeps flying away.

- I can't find the right balance between writing blogs and writing blogs.

- I spend too much time rocking a chair.

- I can't count and have no idea why this causes blog gaps.

- Some days I run away to join the circus.

- I spend a lot of time preparing dinner for my neighbors who are cannibals.

- I'm in love and can't get out.

Top Ten Excuses For The Gap Between Blogs

The last blog was on January 19th.  Here are the top ten reasons for the gap between it and this blog:

10 - The dog ate my Internet.

9 - My computer eloped with my smart phone.

8 - I couldn't find a pencil and paper.

7 - I was eaten by cannibals, but they barfed.

6 - I joined a cult, rested in bed and drank plenty of fluids and the cult went away.

5 - My uncle died for the third time.

4 - January 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28 and 29 were religious holidays.

3 - I had the swine flu and the bird flu and discovered that pigs can fly.

2 - I washed my brain and couldn't do a thing with it.

And the Number 1 excuse for the gap between the last blog and this blog:  Space.