HEARING THINGS

I swear on the wart on my grandmother's nose that I heard the following words come from the following things:

A stain said, "Don't be a washout."

Some mud asked, "Where's the stick?"

Over and over an apology said, "I'm sorry.  I'm sorry.  I'm so so sorry."

A pencil said to me, "You got it write!"  (Or was it, "You got it.  Write!")

My cell phone occasionally says to me, "Ring!  Ring!  Ring!"   I'm not sure what that means.

Some days my blog says to me, "Are you scraping the bottom of the barrel?"   I think I know what that means.