On Christmas

Christmas walks into a bar and the bartender says, "What will it be?"
And Christmas says, "I'll have some cheer, please."
The bartender serves Christmas some cheer.  Christmas drinks it and is about to pay.
"No," says the bartender, "don't pay me.  It's Compliments of the Season."



"Why did Christmas cross the road?"
"Why?"
"Because it was December 26."



"How many Christmases does it take to light a change bulb?"
"Don't you mean change a light bulb?"
"No, it's the holidays and anything goes."
"Okay, how many Christmases does it take to light a change bulb?"
"Seven million."
"Seven million?"
"Seven million.  It's a silly question, so it gets a silly answer."



Who is Merry Christmas, and why is everyone repeating her name?



Christmas walks into a bar and the bartender says,"Oh my God!  You're white!"
"Relax," says Christmas, "it's just a dream."



"Can you show me how to light a change bulb?" asked one Christmas to another.
"Yes," said the other Christmas, "but let's wait until there are 7 million of us to make my lesson worth teaching."



Christmas walks into a bar and the bartender says,"What?  Am I still dreaming?"
"No," says Christmas, "you're a bartender."

"Knock.  Knock."

"Who's there?"

"Christmas."

"Christmas?  Back again already?  It seems like only a year since you were here last."