Not All About Marriage

"Why did the marriage cross the road?"
"Why?"
"It wanted to see whether it would be happier on the other side."


A marriage walked into a bar and the bartender said, "Thank you!  Thank you!  Thank you!  You're the reason my business does well."


"How many marriages does it take to change a light bulb?"
"I dunno."
"One, but only after many months of counseling."

"Knock.  Knock"

"Who's there?"

"Happily."

"Happily who?"

"Happily Married."

"Really?  I never knew that you existed."

At what point during the marriage does the woman get promoted to five-star general, while the man remains a private?

Marriage is guaranteed to take away your fear of death.

"Whoa!  You're saying negative things about marriage.  Haven't you got anything positive to say?"

"Something positive about marriage?"

"Yes."

"Yes, I do have something positive to say about marriage."

"What?"

"Divorce."