All About Time Machines

"Why did H.G. Wells cross the road?"
"Why?"
"To write on the other side."


"Why did the time machine cross the road?"
"I dunno."
"To give H.G. Wells a story idea."


"How many time machines does it take to change a light bulb."
"How many?"
"One, but it doesn't change the bulb.  The time machine travels into the future until someone else changes the bulb."

"Knock.  Knock."

"Who's there?"

"Time machine."

"Time machine who?

"Yes."

"I said, 'Time machine who?' "

"And I said, 'Yes.' "

"Why?"

"Because 'Who' is my last name."

"Really?"

"Yes. The Who's were the first family of time machines created by Professor Thomas P. Ticktock."

"Interesting, but too much information for a knock-knock joke."

A time machine walked into a bar and the bartender said, "Mr. Who, how are you?"

"How did you know my last name?" said the time machine.

And the bartender said, "I recognized you from the knock-knock joke.  What will it be?"

"I'll have a clock on the rocks, please."

"I'm sorry," said the bartender, "but we ran out of clocks yesterday."

"No worries," said the time machine, "I'll come back 2 days ago."

And when he finished writing, H.G. Wells crossed back across the road and walked out of this blog.