All About Critics

"Why did the critic cross the road?"
"Why?"
"To find something wrong with the other side."


"How many critics does it take to change a light bulb?"
"How many?"
"Three.  One to change the bulb and the other two to criticize the process."


A critic walked into a bar and the bartender said, "What will it be?"
And the critic said, "Did you have to ask me that way?"
"What was wrong with the way I asked?" said the bartender.
And the critic said,"Nothing, but you didn't have to ask me that way."

"Knock.  Knock"

"Who's there?"

"A critic."

"A critic who?"

"Your door needs painting."

"Do you see anything wrong with The End?"
"Yeah.  Look how the curtains cover part of the T in The and the D in End."
"You're right."
"What a failure this funny bone guy is.  He can't even get The End right."
"Okay, we're finished here.  Let's go somewhere else where we will find something wrong."