Not All About Assassinations

On Friday November 22, 1963, O. J. Simpson assassinated President John F. Kennedy.  Simpson was the lone gunman.  Anything else you have heard or read about the Kennedy killing is fiction.


"Why did the assassination cross the road?"
"Why?"
"To kill a chicken on the other side."


An assassination walked into a bar and the bartender screamed, "Duck!"
And the assassination said, "No thanks, just a beer please."

"How many assassinations does it take to change a light bulb?"

"How many?"

"Only one if it isn't a conspiracy."

"What do you get when you cross an assassination with someone putting on clothes?"

"What?"

"Someone who is dressed to kill."

"What do you get when you cross an assassination with a statue?"

"I dunno.  What do you get?"

"You get something that birds are afraid to poop on."

"What do you get when you cross an assassination with   the CIA?"

"I dunno."

"A cover-up."

"Why are assassinations good at selling?"

"Why?"

"Because they kill the competition."

"Knock.  Knock"

"Who's there?"

"Assassination."

"Assassination who?"

BANG!