Not All About Noise

"Why did the noise cross the road?"
"Why?"
"Because it was coming from a chicken."
"But why was the chicken making noise?"
"It was upset that it was in a silly blog."



Some noise walked into a bar and the bartender said, "What will it be?"
And the noise said, "What?"
"What will it be?" repeated the bartender.
"Uh?"
"WHAT DO YOU WANT?" shouted the bartender.
"Sorry you had to shout," said the noise, "but sometimes I can't hear because of the noise."



"What do you get when you mix noise with uproar, shouting, pandemonium and nonsense?"
"What?"
"Parliament." 



If noise falls in a forest and there are no trees, then where did the noise fall?

"Knock.  Knock."

"Who's there?"

"Silence."

"Silence who?"

"So, what type of noise was the chicken making?"

"Didn't you hear it?"

"No, I was away looking for a forest with no trees."

"It was so loud you should have heard it no matter where you were.  The chicken shouted nonsense creating such an uproar and pandemonium."

"Really?  That chicken must have been a member of parliament."

"How much noise does it take to change a light bulb?"

"I dunno."

"Not much if the noise is coming from a powerful person."

"So, what do you want?" asked the bartender.

"What?" said the noise.

"WHAT DO YOU WANT?"

"I'm not sure," said the noise. "Do you think I should get a hearing aid?"